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Changing Your Thinking is Easier Than You Think

Changing Your Thinking is Easier Than You Think

Are rampant destructive thoughts keeping you down? We all have some repetitive thoughts that perpetuate our sadness, anger, and fear, and keep us from feeling joy, love, and peace.

If you’re struggling right now, here’s something you can do to get a taste of the power of Attitude Reconstruction and get started on your own reconstruction today. We’re all born with five Tools we can use to make change – our emotions, thoughts, intuition, speech, and actions. In this article I’ll explain how to use your second tool, your thoughts, to replace unruly thinking with something that will serve you much better.

There are two elements to rewiring. First, you need something constructive to focus on Reliable Truths, and second you need “powering” — a technique to internalize those thoughts. Before you read further, I’d suggest you get three 3 x 5 index cards or post-it notes, a pen, and a timer if you have one.

Read through the list of Truths for the grouping (preferably out loud). These are statements about yourself and are related to the emotions of sadness and joy. Write down one or two Truths that resonate for you.

TRUTHS TO HONOR YOURSELF AND MOVE FROM SADNESS TO JOY:  

* What I’m seeking is within me.

* My job is to take care of myself.

* Life is for learning. We all make mistakes.

* I’m doing the best I can. OR I did the best I could.

* My viewpoints and needs are as valid as yours.

* I am responsible for what I think, feel, say, and do.

* I can do this.

* I love myself regardless of what I do.

Now read the entire second grouping of reliable Truths (which are about other people, things, and situations, and are related to the emotions of anger and love. Select one or two of them and write them on a second card or piece of paper.

TRUTHS TO ACCEPT PEOPLE & THINGS & GO FROM ANGER TO LOVE:

* People and things are the way they are, not the way I want them to be.

* My focus is myself.

* What he/she thinks of me is none of my business.

* He is doing the best he can. She did the best she could.

* I accept you no matter what.

* We are all on our own paths.

* Your viewpoints and needs are as important as mine.

* We can handle this together.

* How can I help?   What can I do?

Finally, do the same with the third grouping of statements. They are about your relationship to time and associated with the emotions of fear and peace. Write down one or two that feel helpful for you.

TRUTHS TO STAY PRESENT & SPECIFIC & MOVE FROM FEAR TO PEACE:

* Everything is all right. Everything will be all right.

* This feeling is temporary. This situation will pass.

* Stop. Breathe. Slow down. Be here now.

* Stay specific.

* One thing at a time.

* I’ll handle the future in the future.

* I’ll do what I can, and the rest is out of my hands.

* Everything is unfolding in its own time.

* Let go.

Now, all you have to do is internalize your reliable truths, by using a technique that I call “powering.” I tell folks that 100,000 repetitions of a truth should about do it. Think about how many times you’ve told yourself the opposite.

To power, you keep repeating your statements over and over with a desire and intention to really know the meaning of what you are saying. You can power silently, but saying it aloud makes it real because you think, speak, and hear the words. You can close your eyes if you want. Change the tone, tempo, emphasis, and speed. If emotions arise, let yourself cry, shiver, or stomp (or however you best move the anger energy) and keep your attention focused on repeating your Truth.

The key is not to voice all the discounters. Set a timer for one minute eleven seconds. Then reset your timer and do it again. It’s great to do five blocks at a time, more or less. Every repetition helps.

You can think your new thoughts as a focused concentrated activity alone, daily or several times a day; repeat them when you hear your old destructive chatter in your head; or say them to yourself while doing other activities, such as showering, driving, or exercising.

There are tangible rewards, which are called “divine shifts,” when you really experience the meaning of what you are saying. Whether you have a shift or not, you’ll definitely feel much better when you take charge of your thinking.

Give it a try. Keep your Truths nearby and start singing your new songs!

Let me know what truths you selected and your experiences or questions.

 

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Jude Bijou, Author
Jude Bijou is a licensed marriage and family therapist, educator, author, and speaker.  Meet Jude

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Attitude Reconstruction
2012 Benjamin Franklin Award
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2012 ForeWord Reviews
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2012 ForeWord Reviews
Winner in Self-Help
2012 International Book Award
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2012 Nautilus Silver Award
Winner in Personal Growth/Self Help/Psychology
2012 LA Festival of Books
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